Requiems Repercussion
by Leeko
Summary: Post R2-Reality is not a fact but an opinion. After the death of the demon emperor Kallen finds herself alone and distraught. She needs something radical to turn her life around. Now she's caught between a horrible nightmare and a beautiful addiction.
1. Selfish

I own no portion of Code Geass or its characters.

**A/N:** I decided to try my hand at a dramatic fic and here it is. I plan for this to be a ten chapter story. I would like to thank all of you for reading. I hope you enjoy it, and if you don't I hope you can appreciate it. Please R & R

**Selfish**

Winter was in its prime as the cold ground held no snow but the air bit through the thickest of clothes. It had been six months since the burial of the demon emperor. There was no funeral, no public announcement, just another body stacked into the Empire's elaborate mausoleum. Things were better now, people no longer feared for their lives in everyday tasks. Smiles had returned to the people and there was peace; a kind of peace that promised to last. Somehow even in losing, Lelouch had managed to claim victory yet again. Albeit an unspoken one, a silent boast for all time. Wherever he was now, Kallen had no doubt that he was pleased with the outcome. That made one of them.

Kallen kept her promise and continued going to school, even though it seemed so trivial now. After fighting with your life on the line in a battle to save the world, high school lost what little edge it ever possessed. She was finally able to take her mother's name, Kozuki. She wore her hair up, although she wasn't entirely sure why. Kallen didn't prefer one style over the other, but for some reason with her hair up it reminded her of the good old days. The days when she would soar through the sky in her Guren, heeding Zero's every word. Of days full of excitement and struggle, living each day as if it were her last. Those days were long gone. While she knew that this world was what she had been fighting for all along, she couldn't help but find her thoughts lost in her memories.

In the hallways of Ashford, students rushed from one end to the other while Kallen walked. She no longer needed her sickly guise but what was the point of rushing? Just to get to the next point where she would stop and reminisce. Strangely enough, even after she no longer needed to pretend to be sick, she now found herself wearing a new mask, a smiling one. She'd lost everyone in the requiem. Shirley was gone, Milly had graduated, Suzaku could never show himself again in school, C.C. had disappeared, Ohgi was engulfed in his new life with Villeta and their new born son, Nina was no longer in attendance and somehow Rivalz had managed to slip through the cracks. Even Anya had gone off with Jeremiah to start an orange farm, Nunnaly was constantly busied by her new tasks as the new empress, and Lelouch... he had passed.

Classes went on in a normal fashion and, as usual, Kallen could pay little attention. Her mind overflowing with 'what ifs'. What if she had stood to protect Lelouch when the Black Knights turned on him? What if she stood by his side even when he became the emperor? What if he'd kissed her back on that dreaded day? What if the world didn't hate him? Still the answers to all of these questions weren't nearly as daunting as the answer to the question she couldn't keep out of her head, no matter how hard she tried. What if she'd never knew him? God that whole ordeal would have been so much easier if she'd never known the identity of Zero. She'd be happy now, she was sure of it... Ignorance is bliss, a phrase completely lost on the ignorant. No one ever realizes how happy they are until suddenly one day, they aren't.

Walking out of the school she saw the only familiar face that remained on campus. He was tall, his blonde hair that resembled a shorter version of hers, save for three braids that dangled down past his collar bone. "Hey Kallen wait up." Gino ran up to her, greeting her with a smile. "You wanna go get some food? I hear this new place opened up recently, their supposed to be pretty good." He was as cheerful and charismatic as ever.

Kallen shook her head. "Sorry Gino, today's not a good day for me. I don't feel well." As much as she enjoyed the company, recently Gino had been pushing his bounds a little too far. While she tried to keep in mind that it's just the way Gino was, he'd gotten carried away with his 'harmless' flirting more than once. A look of concern came over him, but Kallen spoke before he had the chance. "Don't worry about it, I'm fine. I just want to go home." She let out a heavy sigh.

"Are you sure that you don't want any company? You seem kind of down." Gino placed a hand on her shoulder, his eyes still full of worry.

"Yes Gino, I'm sure." Her tone had a bit of a bite to it as she reached up and removed his hand from her shoulder. Before he had a chance to respond Kallen started walking again.

Gino watched her leave with wide eyes. "Sheesh, what's gotten into her lately?" He asked himself, still the view of her walking away was worth the trouble.

Kallen exhaled sharply as she continued her walk towards her place. The streets were filled with people smiling and talking to each other, they all seemed so happy. A happiness earned from bloodshed, and unfortunately it wasn't contagious. Kallen looked towards the horizon, even six months after the final task there were still ghettos. The world couldn't be fixed in a day after all. It was hard to say what was pulling her there but she gave into it. She walked towards the ghetto without a purpose. Block by block her surroundings became gloomier; the buildings were still war torn and crumbling. She couldn't say why but it felt like home, not like her house, but where she belonged. She ventured further into the ghetto as the streets were now sparse, those that were walking around seemed to be either prostitutes, thieves or addicts.

As she walked she could feel predatory eyes fall upon her. A ragged man stepped from around the corner with a knife in hand. "Hey there girly, what's a pretty bit like you doing in this part of town?" Kallen looked up at him lazily, a slight squint in her eyes. She remained perfectly silent as he approached her, step by step. "By your looks I can tell you have money on you. Hand it over and I let you go." Kallen widened her stance slightly, her arms rested at her sides, an open invitation for the thief. "Are you stupid or something? Don't they teach anything at schools anymore? I said give me the money!" The man took a swipe at Kallen, it wasn't meant to connect, just to frighten her. Even so Kallen remained where she stood, her heartbeat steady and calm. Her near suicidal demeanor was offsetting to the thief. He had no intention of hurting her, but he couldn't very well walk away now. He made another jab for her arm, this time he was within range.

In a single fluid motion she raised her left hand to grab his attacking wrist. Her right arm struck the inside of his elbow, forcing his extended arm to collapse. At that point it took little force to push the knife back into the thief's neck. A look of fear and shock replaced his aggressive features as he fell to his knees. Kallen watched with indifference as the man bled out on the sidewalk. "The only ones who should kill are those who are prepared to be killed." Kallen's voice was completely void of emotion. She could see others in the streets, and just as they watched while Kallen was being robbed, they watched while the thief died. Some didn't even appear to acknowledge the world around them, ranting and raving about something. They were hallucinating. Kallen tilted her head for a moment. She recognized that symptom. "Refrain? Who would want to go back into the past? Not when the present is so-" She cut herself short, realizing what she was saying. Her eyes searched the area for someone that wasn't under the influence of the drug. She saw a small group of guys talking amongst themselves. "Hey!" She called out. The three of them looked up to see her walking towards them. They seemed nervous, reaching inside their long draping jackets. Kallen raised her hands in surrender. "I don't want trouble.. I'm looking for a dealer."

The three of them exchanged surprised glances back and forth. "What are you looking for?" The man in the middle asked, still suspicious of her.

"Refrain." Kallen could barely believe the words coming out of her mouth, the substance she had once forced from Lelouch's hand. Surely he wouldn't want her to go through with this. Still, he'd been selfish in the requiem, in regards to her at least. Now it was her turn. If anything could take her away from this hell and make her happy again she was willing to try it. If **anything** could give her a chance to see Lelouch again, it was worth any risk. She pulled out her wallet and took out the cash she had inside. "Whatever this will get me." She handed over the small wad of money to the man in the middle. He flipped through it in his hand, counting off the bills.

"Alright, here you go." He pulled out two vials from his jacket and handed them over.

Kallen looked at the vials for a moment, thinking. "Hey, what about the needle?"

The three of them laughed. "This your first time?" Kallen gritted her teeth, how dare they look down on her. Still, they had yet to show her any hostility so she wouldn't fight them. She nodded quietly. The man on the left reached into his draping jacket and pulled out the device in question. Kallen reached out for it but the man quickly pulled it out of reach. "Hey now, nothing's free."

Kallen blinked, "but I gave you all the money I had."

"Well then, we'll be taking one of those back." The man stated as he pointed towards the vials in her hand. Kallen shrugged and gave back one of the vials.

Once she had the vial and the needle she continued her walk back home. Time seemed to drag as she was anticipating what this would be like. She'd never done anything like it before, so she had no idea what to expect.

Kallen arrived at home and walked in the front door. Her mother was sitting on the couch watching something on TV. "Hey sweetie, you have a nice day at school?"

Kallen smiled towards her mother. "Yeah, I'm just going to go to my room and get started on my homework."

"Alright dear, we're having leftovers for dinner tonight, is that okay?" Her mother asked turning her head in Kallen's direction.

"Sounds great, is it in the fridge?" Kallen asked walking towards the stairs. Kallen's Mom nodded with a smile before returning to her program. Kallen felt a sting of guilt, she didn't like lying to her mother but she didn't want to worry her either.

Kallen hurried up to her room and locked the door behind her. She sat on her bed and pulled the vial and needle out of her pockets. Biting her lower lip, she inserted the drug into the device. Her right hand was trembling as she brought the needle to her left arm. Kallen closed her eyes and held her breath as she felt the metal graze against her skin. She pulled the trigger and winced slightly as the needle pierced her forearm.


	2. Home Again

**A/N: **I own no portion of Code Geass. Thank you for reading, I appreciate it. Please leave a review and let me know what you think so far : )

**Home Again**

Kallen opened her heavy eyes, everything in front of her was a blur. All she could see were vague shapes in front of her. She was on the floor of a room, a small room. She pulled herself to her unsure feet, each step seemed to be a task in itself. There was a chair in front of her, it was the only other thing in the room. Those vague shapes slowly grew definition and form until her vision was nearly perfect. "Where am I?" She asked aloud although she couldn't hear anything. Had she gone deaf? Did she actually speak, or was it in her head? Kallen reached a hand out in front of her, the walls seemed slightly transparent, yet clearly visible. She placed her hand on the wall, it was firm. She could feel it, it was cold. The chill sent a shiver up her spine. Was this the expected effect of refrain? As if someone was turning up the volume on the world, she could hear a voice gradually becoming louder and more pronounced.

"..llen. Kallen? Kallen, can you hear me?" Nunnally was asking. She had been eagerly awaiting Kallen to regain consciousness. She couldn't help but worry for her. Every day that Kallen had been unconscious, Nunnally made an effort to come in and check on her.

Kallen reared her head around to see Nunnally in her wheel chair with a remorseful look on her face. This was weird, everything felt real, very real in fact. Granted, she had never taken refrain before, but still, from the chill of the walls and floor on her bare skin to the tightness of her dress, it was almost frightening. "Nunnally! What's going on? Where am I?" Taking another look around Kallen recognized this place. It was the prison she'd been held in, before the battle for Tokyo.

Nunnally's face brightened with the sound of Kallen's voice. "Thank goodness you're finally awake. You've been unconscious for several days."

Kallen shook her head and looked at her surroundings. Everything was so detailed, she could make out all of the screws and bolts that held the bridge together. "Several days? What are you talking about?"

"After you attacked Suzaku.." Nunnally paused for a moment, she seemed disappointed. "You were seen as a liability, so the guards came in and knocked you out. They said you hit your head pretty hard. We weren't sure if you were going to wake up at all." Nunnally's voice trailed off, not wanting to think of the possibility. Even though they were supposed to be enemies, Nunnally liked Kallen quite a bit. They'd been on the student council together for some time. Regardless of their allegiance, Nunnally couldn't wish ill will on another person, let alone a friend.

Kallen was confused, she searched her memory for an incident where she'd been knocked unconscious. Nothing came to mind. Kallen looked at her hand and hesitantly moved her hand to the back of her head. She pressed lightly and pain throbbed where she touched. Quickly she found herself in a panic, she was past worried, bordering on terrified. What had she done? She brought her hand back in front of her face, it was shaking. Quickly she forced her hand away, she looked back up to Nunnally but another woman was now standing at her side.

With few words she wheeled Nunnally away. Kallen could hear that Nunnally was trying to protest but the woman quickly silenced her. "Viceroy this is urgent, you must insist that you come with me." The door hissed shut as they left Kallen alone.

"What could be that important?" Kallen asked aloud. The idea came to her mind in a flash. This must be the battle for Tokyo, the Government Beuro was under attack and they had to ensure Nunnally's safety. It all made sense now. But if that were the case, that would mean that she was about to be released by Sayoko. The doors hissed open again, three soldiers entered. Kallen couldn't help but smile, it was her executioners. The men charged with killing her to ensure she didn't escape. They didn't say a single word as they walked onto the bridge leading to the door in front of her. The first raised a case containing a lethal injection, they seemed surprised that Kallen didn't try to hide or shield herself at all. Suddenly they fell to the floor in complete silence. Behind them stood Sayoko, with shurikens in her hand. With tears in her eyes she called out, "Sayoko!" She never thought she would be so pleased to see the female ninja.

"You're looking well." Sayoko responded with a briefcase in hand. "Master Rolo has gone on to secure Miss Nunnally." She raised the suitcase in her hands to show her the contents. "We came to give you a present Miss Kallen. It should fit." Inside was her flight suit, just as she remembered it. Sayoko opened the door and they made their way to the hanger.

"Thank you Sayoko for rescuing me." Kallen said with a sincere smile. Sayoko merely nodded and they entered the large hanger. Standing all by itself was her Guren S.E.I.T.E.N. It was a beautiful sight to behold, she hadn't seen it for months now. Just seeing it in front of her made Kallen well up with joy.

"I think Miss Milly's former fiancé is behind the changes. There seems to be a draft construction manual inside. Shall-"

"I don't need a manual, let's get this thing going." Kallen said confidently while tying her trademark headband. She jumped into the cockpit and inserted her key. The runway lights flickered on as the Guren roared to life, all the systems were operational and ready to launch.

"We're still trying to determine master Zero's current position. Shall I transfer the IFF data?" Sayoko asked typing away on the computer in front of her. With a few simple commands she was able to complete the prelaunch necessities.

Kallen now remembered what her immediate mission was: to rescue Zero. Her features quickly hardened to grizzly resolve as she gripped the controls tightly. "Yes." Kallen responded simply, checking all the controls to make sure they were as she remembered. Once satisfied she closed the cockpit hatch. "You go after the Viceroy, I'm going to save Zero." The words alone brought a wave of pleasure to Kallen's body. She couldn't wait to hear his voice again. "Guren S.E.I.T.E.N. eight elements now launching." Kallen's heart beat picked up as the lights on the side of the runway flashed by faster and faster as she accelerated. With a blast of energy she blew down the nearest wall. Once outside she went full throttle. If her memory was accurate Zero was engaged in combat with the Vampire of Britannia.

The Guren zipped across the battle field, crushing units effortlessly. She left nothing but a trail of explosions in her wake until she found the Percival and Valkyrie squadron which detained Zero. In a quick dash she was able to destroy the Valkyrie squadron before they knew what had hit them. The Percival backed away from Zero to judge the current threat. Kallen narrowed her eyes. "So it seems that I get to take your precious life again, Vampire of Britannia!" Then she heard him, she heard Zero, the voice she could only play back over and over in her head until now.

"Kallen is that you?" Zero asked, thankful for the timely rescue.

Kallen stopped in her tracks. Tears welled in her eyes, just as she expected. "Yes Zero, I've returned to your side. I'll never leave you again. I promise." Noticing that she was distracted for a moment, the Percival moved in to attack. Kallen knew his strategy all too well. "What a pathetic excuse for a Knight." Kallen parried his attack with her blade, leaving his back exposed. With a single blow the Guren gripped the cockpit and ripped it from the Percival. Kallen's adrenaline was rushing now, for the first time in what seemed like ages. The shell of the Percival fell from the sky while Kallen maintained a tight grip on the cockpit. With a satisfying twist of her wrist the radiant wave surger activated, melting the capsule in her clawed arm. Sir Bradley's scream could be heard from inside the Guren, the plea for his own wicked life.

Lelouch's face appeared on the screen within the Guren, he seemed both amazed and relieved. "Kallen your loyalty is unrivaled, as are your piloting skills. Quickly now, we must turn the tide back in our favor." He spoke with all the charisma and valiance that he'd possessed for as long as she could remember.

Kallen only had moments to marvel at the sight of Zero before Suzaku and Gino were upon her. Guilford also joined the fight, although he could do little more than buy Kallen time as he pinned down Gino and his Tristan. "Suzaku!" Kallen growled. The Lancelot let loose a blast from its Hadron Blaster. Luckily with all the recent upgrades, the Guren was able to deflect it with ease.

"What? She deflected it?" Suzaku questioned the sheer possibility of such a thing. In that moment of disbelief Kallen launched her harkens, the first destroyed the Hadron blaster and the second bit into the Lancelot's right shoulder. With a violent heave Kallen closed the distance between the two of them. Suzaku raised an arm to counter but Kallen cut it off at the elbow with her dagger. She had to stop him before he could fire the F.L.E.J.A.

Gino broke free of Guilford's hold and made a bee line for Zero's Shinkirou. With a slight adjustment Kallen launched her clawed arm after the Tristan. "Don't you dare touch Zero!" Kallen screamed as the arm snaked towards Gino. With her attention split Suzaku drew his sword to cleave her in two. Now that the Guren had new energy wings it was simply too fast for the Lancelot. In a seemingly effortless motion she side stepped his slash and a delivered single strike to his sword, forcing it from his hand. The Guren's claw found its mark and gripped the left wing of the Tristan.

Gino looked back over his shoulder to see his wing get ripped clean off his back. "Faster than the Tristan? How is that possible?" He panicked as the Tristan fell into a corkscrew dive.

Kallen brought her attention back onto Suzaku as her gauntlet returned. "Now Suzaku, I will crush you!" She extended her clawed arm to clench the Lancelot's torso.

Suzaku's geass took control of him as he raised his right leg to block her claw. As the Guren gripped the Lancelot's thigh he ejected the limb. The Guren was momentarily occupied as the appendage melted. In that moment Suzaku pulled back and fired the F.L.E.J.A. towards the center of the Tokyo settlement.

Kallen watched in horror as the warhead drew closer and closer to its destination. "No... I couldn't stop it." Kallen smashed the sidewall of the Guren with her fist. Pain shot up her arm as her fist connected. "I knew what you were going to do!.. Zero.. I'm sorry, I've failed you." Tears, once again, were welling within her eyes.

Zero was consumed by shock as the warhead detonated. The blast already engulfed a huge area and it was growing quickly. "Nunnally!" His scream was gruesome and without restraint, it sounded as if his soul was dying as the name escaped his lips.

"Damnit!" Kallen shouted realizing that both, the outcome was her fault, and that she couldn't escape the blast radius. Luckily Zero was outside the warhead's reach. Kallen's mind was racing for a way out.. It was a long shot, but it was all she had. She raised her radiant wave shield in front of her. The blast met her shield and the two forces raged against each other. Everything become blindingly bright as the blast consumed her. The inside of the Guren became blurry very rapidly until everything went black.

The blackness began to clear as shapes became visible one by one. "Zero!" Kallen lunged forward only to find herself in her room with her arm outstretched. Reality had returned, like a tidal wave crushing a sand castle. A lump caught in her throat as she collapsed to the floor. She had forgotten about this world, completely enveloped in the other. Tears continued to fall down her cheek as she clenched her fist until her knuckles turned white. At that point pain shot up her right arm. This sudden realization caught Kallen off guard. She thought back to the memory she'd just relived, was it a memory? She didn't even know what to call it anymore. A thought came to her mind as she looked at her shaking hand, the same way she had in that prison cell. She closed her eyes and held her breath as her hand moved to the back of her head.

Kallen pressed lightly against the back of her head and gasped in pain.


	3. Questioning

**A****/N**: Hello faithful, I'm glad that you have all stuck around despite the darker tone of this fic. If you haven't done so already, please take the time to read my other work in progress: Wings of the Butterfly. Those of you that have read it and came to this fic because it's another piece of my work, I greatly appreciate it! I would like extend a special thank you to three of my readers as they have been a huge source of inspiration to me: S7K, Infinite Freedom and Gekkogeek. Thanks goes out to all of you who have reviewed, I thank you very much for your support and feedback, it is vital to me as a writer. Now then, onto the story.

**Questioning**

Kallen had just woken up, her eyes heavy and lazy. She looked around her room, trying to evaluate where she was. She recognized it as her bedroom and slung her feet over the side of the bed, wearily bringing herself to her feet. She stretched and let out a drawn out yawn. Looking at the pictures she had pinned to her wall, it was obvious she was back in her time. That's right, after she had come off her high she'd simply fallen asleep. Between her normal time, her dreams and the world she found within that drug, it was becoming difficult to tell what was real and what was merely an illusion. She reached to the back of her head once more, the spot was still sore. Somehow that other world had affected her somehow, that made it real didn't it? She continued to think as she began to get dressed for school. Kallen thought back on the events that took place while she was under the influence of the drug, the last thing she remembered was being consumed by the F.L.E.J.A. blast. After putting her shirt on and pulling up her skirt, she looked at herself in the mirror. For the first time in quite a while she noticed the slightest of smiles on her lips. Everything on the other side had felt so real, his voice... It **was** his voice, he reacted to what she said... Kallen sighed and slapped herself, she didn't brace for it and it left a sting on her cheek. "Get a hold of yourself Kozuki, it was a drug, that's what it's supposed to do. Make you believe..." Kallen knew all too well the effects of the drug from an external point of view, but she had never imagined it to be like that.

"Kallen? Are you ready for school? You don't want to be late do you?" Kallen's mother called from down stairs. Kallen took a deep breath and walked downstairs, taking her breakfast to go as usual. "Have a nice day dear."

-x-x-x-x-x-

Gino was waiting at the school gates for Kallen as usual. "Hey there, you feeling any better?"

Kallen thought on that for a moment. She imagined that she would be happier now, because she'd seen and heard Lelouch so recently. She had tasted the thrill of combat, flying the Guren again. It was fantastic, she never knew just how incredible her day to day life used to be. Unfortunately this had the reverse effect, coming down from that high was devastating, just like every dream that she'd had involving Lelouch since his death. The better she felt the harder she crashed, it was a vicious cycle, after all if she didn't ever get that taste of happiness she would eventually bottom out. Neither course held any promise.

"Kallen?" Gino asked again. "Did you hear me? Are you feeling any better?" His expression turning even more worrisome.

"Yes I heard you." Kallen snapped before letting out an upset sigh. "I'd rather not talk about it."

"It's okay, I understand." Gino was trying to be as comforting as possible, he reached an arm around to try to give her a reassuring hug. However, he quickly found his hand swatted away, before he could register what had happened Kallen barred his path and grabbed him by the breast of his shirt.

"What is the matter with you? You always think you can just fix everything with your painted smiles and your damned charm!" Tears began to well in Kallen's eyes but she resolved to stop them from falling, she would not show weakness here. "Well you can't..." Her tone was cold as she pushed him back with some force, just enough to make him stumble backwards. She shook her head and turned back to head into the school.

Gino was surprised, he was scared. Not afraid of what Kallen would do to him, but what something was doing to Kallen. She seemed to be losing herself recently, becoming less and less like the fire cracker that he once knew and admired. Was something going on with her?

Kallen's classes continued on in normal manor, she was preoccupied thinking about Gino. How could he think about trying to get somewhere with her through sympathy? Suddenly she was glad that she had the chance to fight him in Knightmare combat recently, and that she kicked his sorry ass. Much better than- What had happened during the first time? She remembered every detail, every word of her most recent battle, and yet for some reason she couldn't remember a single detail of its predecessor. The F.L.E.J.A. was fired and she'd been caught in the blast, both times or just the one? Did she fight the Lancelot the first time? Did she survive the second time around? The memories were merging, no longer was she able to discern the real battle from the refrain battle. There was only one set of memories now, could that mean... Clearly that realm was having effects on her in this one, that made it real didn't it? And if it was real and the memories replaced her old ones, did she have the ability to rewrite the past? A shot of hope ran through her a full smile coming across her face, yes she believed it, she had to. It was too promising to let go of. All she had to do was go back and fix everything, with her current knowledge of the events to come, she could certainly prevent the Requiem from coming to be.

However this time, Kallen would test her current reality, she needed something to signify that this world was real. Thinking back on what Nunnally had told her, the other worlds rationale did make sense, or perhaps that was just her heart trying to create reason for her mind. She needed something visible, just as she needed something only in her mind, like her headache. Visible was easy enough, she pulled a pen from her bag and scribbled 'zero' on the back of her hand. The mental as well wasn't difficult to think of, she needed something that she wouldn't have to think about that could still remind her of this world. She knew what she had to do. Kallen held her breath to stop any gasp of pain and kicked her right heel into the top of her left foot, just enough to make it uncomfortable when walking. She made a quick note in her notebook, just in case it healed and she'd forgot upon her return. She needed to find out just what the relationship between the two worlds were.

The bell rang signaling everyone to leave, she picked up her things and quickly made her way out of the classroom. She picked up her strides until she was full on sprinting, her heart raced, she had finally found that glimmer that she had been waiting for, begging for... dying for.

Gino noticed the red head in an incredible rush and tried to follow her. He kept up with her past the school gates. "Kallen! Wait up!" She didn't seem to pay any heed to his words as she never broke stride. Eventually Gino found himself unable to keep up with her, noticing that she was heading for the ghettos. "Why would she be running towards the ghettos?" His suspicion hiked as he continued onward.

Kallen finally slowed when she reached the heart of the ghetto, she paused for a moment and took in everything around her. The sounds, the smells, the sights, the way the crumbling buildings felt abrasive on her skin. Without at doubt this wasn't fake, this place existed, just the same as the other side. Looking from one to the other was no different from walking room to room in a house. But what did that mean? The two of them couldn't be real, could they? One of them had to be fake, both had some evidence on their side. It was a battle against her heart and her mind, her heart was commanding her to leave, while her mind pleaded with her to stay. "Zero always said our strength comes from our hearts." Kallen searched for the only 'normal' looking people that hung out down here, in this area there were dealers and there were addicts. If they weren't off spouting non sense, it was a safe bet that they were selling. All the dealers were in contact with the others to prevent overloading an area, if any military or cops were sited, they'd inform the others. Kallen found the same three men that had sold her the last batch. She approached them slowly. "Hey, remember me?" She again raised her hands to show she meant no harm, it was the uniform that made them jumpy. Britannian students weren't common customers of gutter rats.

One of the three laughed, "Yeah I remember you girly. You need another fix?" He smiled like the devil himself, a jacket full of sinful apples. Kallen nodded silently to confirm. "How much ya got?"

Kallen reached for her wallet and then realized, she didn't grab any more money from her room. "I'm sorry I forgot-"

"You forgot? What do you think this is?" The man asked, snarking.

"Well there must be something I can do." Kallen said, knowing money wasn't the only currency in the world.

The lead man looked to his two friends with a smirk, "yeah I'm sure we can work something out." His hand slowly moved down to his belt.

Kallen realized the gesture and pulled back in disgust. "What? No. That's not what I meant." She felt the three men widen their spread surrounding her, backing her up against the wall.

"We know what you meant." The lead mans belt now undone.

Kallen narrowed her eyes and quickly examined the three of them, to them it probably looked like she was afraid. They closed in all at once, Kallen swept her leg and kicked out the leading foot of the man on the left, forcing his stance to widen to the effect doing the splits. With a swift kick to the outside of his knee and a loud crunch the man was crippled. As he fell the other two backed up and began to reach inside their jackets. Kallen had realized where their firearms were located when she examined them, the fire arm of the crippled drug lord was well within her reach. She ducked behind him using him as a human shield while she pried the gun from his jacket. With two lightning shots the other two collapsed to the ground. The crippled man looked up at her with horror as she pulled the barrel to his head and squeezed the trigger. All head shots, ensuring she didn't destroy any of the Refrain on their person. She looted the three of them, only finding about ten bottles. "That's all your lives were worth." Kallen shook her head in disgust, standing over the deceased. At least they had another clean needle on them, seeing the opportunity she loaded up the first bottle and pulled it to her arm. It felt like nothing more than a bee sting as the cool liquid dumped into her veins. A smile grew over Kallen's face as her vision began to blur.

"Lelouch..."

**A/N**: Back down the rabbit hole our heroine goes. As I'm sure you could tell by now, I'm going to be splitting each chapter into a different 'realm'. You may think as either of them being the real reality, neither is correct or incorrect. You can either accept this as taking place during R2 or as an epilogue. Kinda like those old books where you got to choose how the story moves along. XD


	4. Guardian

**A/N:** Greetings faithful, welcome to chapter four. Thank you very much for reading, I truly appreciate your continued support and feedback. A lot of people are saying what a dark fic this is but that's the beauty of it, it doesn't have to be dark at all, just change your perspective ;) If you prefer the darkness, embrace the other reality lol. This chapter is dedicated to a specific reader, you know who you are.

**Guardian**

Kallen was nearly blinded by the bright hazed light as it slowly became sharper. A shadow waved back and forth in front of her, she came to realize that it was a hand snapping its fingers. After realizing that there should be sound it gradually grew until she could hear the snaps and the voice of the woman standing over her. "Kallen, Kallen can you hear me?"

Kallen shook her head and covered her face with her hand, rubbing her eyes and forehead to try and quell the headache that relentlessly throbbed throughout her skull. "Yes I can hear you." She clenched her teeth as she tried to sit up, the pain in her head seemed to get worse when she moved.

"I can see you're in some pain, the medicine we gave you should kick in soon. You're lucky to survive that blast you know. If it wasn't for the Guren's advanced shields you'd be dead right now."

"I'll be sure to thank Rakshata, now where's Zero?" Kallen opened her eyes to find herself in the medical wing of the Ikaruga, every bed had a host. Most were unconscious, those that weren't wept in either pain or defeat, she couldn't tell.

"Well master Zero is in his quarters as usual, he seemed rather upset. But Miss Kozuki I must insist that you wait a moment, your condition is rather delicate." The nurse said, her tone slowly dropping off.

"Meaning what?" Kallen asked with a raised brow.

"The Guren discharged a large amount of electricity when it overloaded. That's what caused you to black out, unfortunately it seems the voltage has caused some brain damage-"

"Brain damage!?" Kallen tried to stand and realized that jolt of pain in her foot, the same from when she had kicked herself. She quickly looked to her hand which had Zero written on it still. 'Shit.' That meant the other world was just as real as this one.

"It's alright Miss Kozuki, your motor functions are intact. From what we've observed over the last twenty hours it seems that nearly all of your neurological responses are fine. You may suffer some acute psychosis-"

"What does that mean?" Kallen could feel her breaths become restricted, taught in her chest.

"Basically that it will be difficult to discern between reality and your imagination. Also it's possible to temporarily lose consciousness for a short period of time. Your brain absorbed a lot of voltage-."

"I need to get out of here." Kallen stated flatly, she didn't have time to lay around in bed.

"Well while we can't force you to stay, I don't recommend it." The Nurse responded grabbing her charts to look over all of her vitals. "Although I suggest you take it easy. You've had a rough couple of days."

"You have no idea." Kallen scoffed and grabbed her clothes that were piled beside her bed. Right now she couldn't worry about her medical issue, besides she was having enough trouble deciphering reality since she woke up in her bed that morning, how much worse could it get? The only thing that mattered right now was finding Zero. After she changed into her Black Knight outfit she wandered back into the halls. They were rather sparse but she accredited this to the overwhelming numbers in sick bay. Her walk turned into a jog, then a full on sprint towards Zero's quarters. She'd visited his grave so many times since he'd passed, leaving flowers and origami cranes that she'd learned how to make. They always disappeared before she came back but this was probably due to looters or groundskeepers. She'd been so desperate to see him again, she made a thousand cranes, working until her joints hurt and her fingertips bled. It had taken her countless hours to make all of them, all for the wish that he would come back to her... Kallen arrived at the door to Zero's quarters, it was password protected but she was one of the privileged few, one of three to be exact. Her wish had come true, through her efforts she was granted this chance. Her heartbeat raced as she punched in the code, half expecting it to be denied, something had to go wrong, this was just too perfect. The doors hissed in acceptance and slowly opened, Zero was sitting with his hands crossed and his head hung in defeat. He didn't attempt to cover his face as she walked in. Kallen looked around but C.C. was nowhere to be found. Her lips opened but her words caught in her throat, she brought her hand to her neck and cleared her throat lightly. "Lelouch?"

Lelouch looked up slowly his face red from tears, "Kallen.." His voice was barely audible, he looked horrible and at the same time beautiful. The despair in his eyes and features were welcome compared to the last memory she had of him, dying on his float, bleeding out for the world to watch and celebrate..

Kallen could contain herself no longer, she ran to the couch tears in her own eyes as she wrapped him in the tightest embrace she could muster. She was very pleased to find him grasping back just as much. Holding onto her for dear life as it were. He was in a vulnerable state, thinking he had just lost his sister to the F.L.E.J.A. blast. "I've finally found you.." She sobbed into his shoulder, her embrace threatening to fracture his ribs. Kallen couldn't find the words to speak, nothing seemed to do her emotions justice. That moment, that was heaven, or what she could only speculate it to be. As imperfect as it was, it couldn't have been better.

"Kallen.. Nunnally was.." The words were heavy and cumbersome as they fell from his mouth.

Kallen adjusted her position so that they were resting forehead to forehead. She watched his lips for a moment, he was so broken. He was leaving himself wide open for her, all that time she had waited, this was that moment she'd dreamed of. She closed her eyes and leaned forward, feeling his breath on her parting lips. Kallen closed her eyes and her heart hummed as their lips brushed against each other. His lips tasted of salt from his tears. He gave into her kiss and returned it, his arms still wrapped around her holding her tight. Kallen's tears fell freely as she continued to hold their kiss, deepening it after a moment kissing his upper lip, allowing him to suck on her bottom lip. Her blood screamed out for him, burning hot beneath her skin. Her tongue danced across his lips, beckoning him to do the same. He complied and Kallen wrapped her arms around the back of his neck. God it felt good, the best she had ever felt in her life. She wanted to hold him there until the end of time, but she had to tell him. To ease his mind, and to prove that his actions were more than just his surrendering to the situation. Kallen pulled back to hold his face in her hands gazing into those long lost amythest gems of his. "No Lelouch, she's not..." His expression turned confused but a ray of hope shown through. He didn't speak, as if waiting for an explanation, did he dare hold out hope for his sister? If there was anyone he could trust it was Kallen, his most loyal piece. "I promise you Lelouch, I saw her shuttle escape myself."

Lelouch closed his eyes and let out a sigh of relief, his features overwhelmed with joy to the point of more tears falling down his delicate face. "What would I ever do without you Kallen?"

"You're never going to find out." Kallen pulled him into another passionate kiss, he returned it hungrily. She could feel it in the air, this lust, it was very much real. No drug could replicate this feeling. She ran her hands down his chest as his hands found their way beneath her shirt slowly rising up her back, sending shivers up her spine. "Lelouch.." She moaned into his ear, his right hand nearing the clasp of her bra.

The ring of the phone pierced the air like a siren. They attempted to ignore it for a moment but it blared on. "If we don't answer they'll just come knocking.." Lelouch said none too pleased with the timing of the call. Something always seemed to interrupt him and Kallen, as if the gods were just teasing them both.

Kallen let out a heavy sigh and pulled herself off him. "I'll answer it.." She picked up the phone, "Hello?" Kallen tried to hide the frustration in her voice.

"Kallen? I thought you were in sick bay?" Ohgi said.

"Apparently not. What'd you need?" Kallen asked trying to get him off the phone.

"I was hoping to talk to Zero but it's probably better that I got a hold of you. I need you to bring Zero the main hanger." He responded, rather grim before hanging up.

"The main hanger?" Kallen asked aloud even though she knew he was no longer on the other line. Then a shock gripped her body. She'd forgotten in the heat of the moment but this was the time that the Black Knights turned on Zero. They were going to capture him and turn him over to Britannia.. Not while she still drew breath, she'd save Lelouch, she already knew their plan. She wasn't the greatest strategist but it's not too hard to play poker when you know your opponents hand. Kallen looked back to Lelouch who was waiting to hear what the phone call was all about. "Lelouch I need you to come with me." As much as she wanted to just damn the rest of the world and spend their last moments together she was determined to fix this. She would give herself the happy ending she deserved, somehow she'd find a way.

Lelouch looked at her puzzled for a moment and began to stand. "What is it?" He sensed something wrong with the way Kallen was standing and the tone she carried in her voice.

"Get your mask and let's move, I'll explain on the way." Kallen commanded firmly, it felt so strange to give Zero orders but she was the only one who could. She remembered this event as it haunted her in many nightmares since. This time she would simply take Lelouch to the Guren and break out of here, unfortunately the Black Knights would not be swayed, not now at least. She had to escape with him so they could regroup and meet on their own terms. With Kallen standing firmly at his side perhaps the Black Knights would be willing to listen. If she could bring the Black Knights under the command of Zero, perhaps she could change the future entirely. This was definitely a turning point in the war, she just had to ensure it turned the other way.

Lelouch grabbed his mask and put it over his face. "Kallen I demand to know what is going on." His tone was Zero's once more, strong and booming.

"The Black Knights have turned against us. I believe Schneizel is behind it. For now we have to get off this ship." Kallen said opening the door to exit. They had to walk casually, if anything seemed out of place Kallen may be discovered to be loyal to Zero instead of the Black Knights.

"Schneizel.." Zero growled beneath his mast, how he would treasure disposing of his older brother. Better yet he would use his geass on him, turn him into a slave for the rest of his pitiful life. That was an end fitting to the snake that he regretfully called a brother. Lelouch's thoughts carried to more important things, how could he turn this around? First he had to figure out just what his brother had fed the Black Knights, what bit of poison did he give them?

They arrived at the separate hanger for the Guren, it was dark. "Good no one seems to be in here." It was difficult to see but the Guren didn't look the way she remembered it. Upon closer inspection she realized that most of the Guren was charred and crumbling. "Oh no." She'd forgotten that the Guren was caught in the blast at Tokyo. She placed a hand on the shredded foot of the Guren, "I'm sorry." It was not operable at the moment, the Guren would need quite a bit of repair work before it could even fly, let alone escape the Ikaruga. "We'll have to go with plan B." Kallen said turning around to walk back towards the door.

"And that would be what exactly?" Zero asked.

"Give me a minute and I'll think of it. We can wait in here for a moment to come up with a plan." Kallen hushed, soon the Black Knights would get suspicious of her and send a search party for them. "We can't use the Shinkirou."

"Why not?" Zero questioned, he wasn't used to playing second fiddle. A position he cared not for.

"Because that's where the Black Knights are waiting to ambush us." Kallen breathed. She wasn't the first choice for on the spot plans for a reason. This was more Lelouch's area, but she was the only one with the information, there was no way to simply tell him everything she knew.

"How could you know that?" Lelouch asked suspiciously, for a moment he had to wonder if Kallen had been in on this whole thing. No one was above suspicion, but he dismissed it quickly, she'd have no reason to tell him about the ambush unless-

The doors to the hanger opened suddenly and the lights flickered on. One man with a visor over his face stepped in his gun raised to their chests, "I got em over here!" Tamaki shouted.

'Unless she was lying to keep him from the Shinkirou. This was the real ambush..' Lelouch finished mentally. '**Kallen you betrayed me**!' Had that been their plan all along? Use the one person he knew he could trust in the entire organization and trap him in a hanger with no escape? With that visor he couldn't use geass on Tamaki, and he'd already used it on Kallen. The board had changed, his king left defenseless to stare down an entire army of foes. He was backed into a corner, defeat immanent.

The doorway quickly filled with more members of the Black Knights with their guns drawn. "Trying to escape were you?" Diethard said, capturing everything on film. "No matter, fire!" He commanded, he was pleased that the troops had waited until he arrived to capture this moment in history.

"NO!" Kallen lunged in front of Zero, shielding her face and chest with her arms in an 'X'. The Black Knights couldn't react fast enough, their volley of bullets already on their way. Kallen did her best to stand upright as nine bullets pierced her skin, most of them taken to the arms. Two in her stomach and one in her chest, close to her heart. The bullets ceased as almost immediately after the first rang out, she wasn't their intended target after all. Kallen felt weak on her feet, no longer able to stand she collapsed on the ground in front of Zero. "I-I'm sorry Lelouch.. I-I couldn't.. save.. you..." She looked up at the mask of Zero in pain and remorse, again she knew everything was coming and again she couldn't stop it. 'Damnit!' Her vision began to blur from loss of blood.

"Now, now. Didn't I tell you I wanted him alive?" Schneizel asked. The Black Knights lowered their guns at the request of the Prince.

Voices continued but were slowly drowned out by a loud, painful ringing. The blurry images faded to black as Kallen could no longer support the weight of her eyelids.

**A/N: **Alrighty, another chapter down. Things are starting to get intense. Hope you enjoyed it, I'd love to hear your thoughts or comments to please take a moment and review. Thank you again, I'll see you next time.


	5. Hit the Wall

**AN: **Greetings faithful, I trust this installment finds you all well and good. We have reached the half way point of this particular story, I hope you've enjoyed it thus far. Thank you to all of you who have reviewed, I know I say it a lot but it really does mean a lot to get feedback. I want to know if I'm doing things right or wrong. So again, thank you.

**Hit the Wall**

Kallen lay flat on her back, her arms and torso screaming out in pain. All that she could see above her was the crystal blue sky. Before long she could make out the clouds that peppered the scenery as well as buildings in the corners of her eyes. Her chest felt wet and sticky, she looked down to see the cause, only to find it stained crimson with her blood. She gasped for air realizing what had just happened, she tried to sit up but her body wouldn't respond. It would be another few minutes before she regained total control of her body.

"Kallen!" Gino screamed, rushing towards his friend on the ground. "Kallen, can you hear me? Say something!"

She recognized that voice. "Gi-no." Kallen coughed out, tilting her head back and closing her eyes from the building pain.

"You're going to be okay Kallen, just hang in there." He reached his arms under her and picked her up fireman style. As he started to walk Kallen was able to get a good view of the area where she had collapsed. There were three bodies near where she had woken up, she recognized them as the men she killed, the drug lords with the intent of forcing themselves on her. There was one other person though, a single man who was across the street his face down in the pavement.

"Wha- what happened?" Kallen asked, trying to find a comfortable way to rest her arms.

"I'm not sure, I was gonna ask you the same thing. All I heard were gunshots in the area, when I arrived I saw the man that was shooting you. I got to him as he was reloading." Gino didn't look down at her, she couldn't tell if it was because of fear or disappointment.

"Did you kill him?" Kallen asked curiously. The man was likely another drug lord that found out that she had killed three of his buddies. Secretly she hoped that Gino had killed the man, not for revenge, but if he did murder him that would mean she wasn't the only one... Guilt, like misery, loves company.

He didn't respond, he simply continued to look forward as he kept a steady pace towards the hospital. An ambulance would have been much easier but it wasn't too far away, there were plenty of clinics in the area due to the overwhelming need for them in the area. Her blood was running down his hands and beginning to soak into his uniform. He'd seen war plenty of times before, killed people unfortunately, but it still didn't prepare him for this. He never wanted to see a friend of his get caught up in a serious fight. It was fine for him to place his life on the line, as long as it didn't involve the ones he cared for. He was just selfish like that...

They arrived at the hospital shortly and checked her into the clinic. Nurses quickly whisked her away leaving Gino with a mountain of paperwork to fill out. He sat in the uncomfortable chairs in the waiting room and stared down at the handful of documents he'd been given. He wanted to just rip up all the legalities right there, time spent in the interest of paperwork was time that could have been spent with Kallen. Still he knew the procedures and followed them like a good soldier. Some parts of you never die. Nearly an hour later he was finished with the paperwork, he had to guess on a lot of answers because frankly, Kallen lived a rather sheltered life. She didn't share much of it with anyone, including him. He'd spent a long time trying to wear down the walls she placed around her. Perhaps his efforts today would give him some favor. He returned to the nurses' station and placed the paperwork on the counter, the woman behind the counter flipped through the pages quickly.

"Are you friend or family sir?" The nurse asked coldly.

"Friend." Gino lowered his head.

"Do you know of a way to contact her family?"

"I don't have her number, so no, I don't. Is she going to be okay?" Gino asked lightly, looking back up at the woman.

"She's conscious, all the bullets missed her vital organs, she's very lucky."

"So then I can see-"

"However," the nurse interrupted. "She has lost a considerable amount of blood, we'll monitor how she's doing after a transfusion. For now, you can wait, but I'd suggest you just go home."

-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x

Kallen looked around in her empty room, it was so sterile and blank. Hospitals never really agreed with her, not since Naoto.. She had tubes going in and out her, her heartbeat could be heard through the steady beeps of the machine next to her. It always seemed so foreign to her, the idea that her heart could be represented by digital lines and monotone beeps. No one was allowed to see that part of her, she kept it locked away. And yet, there it was on a screen for everyone to see. Of course it wasn't that they could peer into her thoughts or feelings but it still didn't help shake the feeling of unease. The only person that she allowed that close was- "Lelouch!" Her memories came rushing back to her, the Black Knights had betrayed him, in her attempt to save him she had actually ensured his capture..

Why did she do everything wrong? She had the ability to go back in time and fix everything, even with all of the information given to her she still managed to make it worse. Going back through time wasn't everything people had always dreamed about, who's to say that you would do better with your second chance? That didn't change what she had to do now though. She had to go back and save Lelouch, whatever the cost. She knew she didn't have much time, with every passing minute Zero was likely to be getting in deeper and deeper trouble.

Kallen looked to her side and found her jacket that she had been wearing, did they seriously just leave it there? Did they know what she had in her pockets? She pulled herself to a sitting position, her body responded by shooting little twinges of pain up her spine. The medication she was on was effective but not absolute. She pulled the bed with her as she walked to her jacket, making sure not to disconnect any of the tubes and alert the staff. Carefully she picked up her jacket and searched the inner pockets, just as she had left there were still nine bottles inside. "Good." She couldn't imagine the trouble she would have to go through to get more in her current condition. She pulled out one of the vials and held it between her index finger and thumb. It was so small, just that little bottle had the ability to take her back to the man she cared for. What a beautiful thing it was. Without delay she searched her jacket for the needle, she searched every pocket but couldn't find it. It wasn't likely that the nurses would have taken it without taking the drugs.. Perhaps she dropped it in the ghetto. However this was the right place to be when looking for a needle, she'd just have to search the cabinets until she found a syringe. As she started to scrounge through the compartments, the door began to open. She gasped for breath and turned to find a familiar face standing in the doorway.

-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x

Kallen's mother checked the mail and noticed that she had a letter addressed to Kallen Kozuki. She walked up to her room and placed it on her desk. It didn't have a return address on it, only two letters written in perfect cursive. "L.L."

-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x

The blonde haired boy looked down at Kallen. He hadn't gotten a good look at her until now, and she didn't look good. Her skin was pale except for the hollows of her eyes, which were darkened slightly. Even her eyes themselves seemed dull, they lacked the life that her azure eyes used to radiate. Perhaps it was the loss of blood or maybe a lack of sleep. He noticed that she had a syringe in her hands a small bottle in the other. "What is that?"

"Don't worry about it Gino." Kallen said in a protective manner.

"Is that what you went to the ghetto for?" He looked back to the door and locked it quickly. "You're doing drugs?" He asked quietly.

"I said leave it be. This isn't about you, I couldn't expect you to understand." Her voice was raspy but determined.

Gino knew that look in her eyes. "Kallen," he walked up towards her, reaching for the bottle. "I'm not going to let you do that. Just hand it to me and we can talk."

She jerked her hands away to pull the items from his reach. "I don't have time for that Gino, we can talk later."

"No we can talk now." He said sternly. "I'm not going to watch you do this to yourself." Again he reached for the bottle, this time a bit more forcefully.

Kallen jerked her hand away from him and quickly struck him with an elbow to the nose. The impact sent a wave of pain through her arm but she didn't care. He was standing between her and the only thing she wanted, the only thing she needed. With their distance closed Gino was able to swat at her hand knocking the bottle to the floor and smashing it. His vision was becoming blurry with tears, he couldn't see her movements clearly so it was difficult to counter them. "I didn't want to do this Gino." Kallen growled as she grabbed him roughly by the back of the head with her now free hand and brought it to connect with her right knee. He hit the ground and with a thud, Kallen raced over to her jacket and grabbed another bottle from the inner pockets. Gino was struggling to stand as she filled the syringe with the tinted liquid. "I have to save Lelouch."

"Kallen what are you talking about? He's gone, and good riddance-"

"How dare you talk about him like that." She said with a scowl on her face. "You have **no** idea what he did." She looked down at her arms which were still wrapped in bandages, blocking her from seeing a strong vein.

Gino finally made it to his feet although still unsteady. "Kallen that's not real, that's the drug talking. Can't you see what it's doing to you?" He turned his head quickly in reaction to a pounding on the door.

"I told you that you wouldn't understand..." Kallen raised the syringe and Gino lunged for her, before he could reach her she plunged the liquid into her neck, she hardly even felt it. He grabbed her a moment and grasped the empty syringe, throwing it to the side.

"Kallen!" He shook her lightly as the door was unlocked from the outside.

She looked up with a smile on her face, a group of people looking down at her. They didn't have facial features, just blank skin, their mouths moved but no words came out. The drug was claiming her quickly this time, whether it was from the injection spot or her lack of blood, she didn't care. She closed her eyes and let bliss take her away.

**AN:** There we have it, another chapter down. Thanks for tuning in, I'll see you in about a week, or if you're reading 'Wings' I'll see you in a couple of days, that chapter is gonna be a doozy ; )


	6. Lock Down

**AN:** Greetings Faithful : ) Good to see you all again for the newest chapter of Requiem's Repercussion. Sorry this chapter came a bit late, I was working on my one shot 'The Arcana' for much longer than I anticipated . Enough about that though, lets get to the story at hand 8D

**Lock Down**

Kallen opened her eyes to another foreign ceiling, another blinding light, another sterile room. Had she left? She tried to sit up but she was strapped to the bed. Surprised, she looked down to find herself belted down to the cot. "Where's Lelouch?" She asked desperately to anyone within ear shot. No one responded. She was alone. Looking around the room she noticed that the room she occupied wasn't a normal infirmary lounge of the Ikaruga, it was the officer's room. Apparently the Black Knights cared enough to give her privacy, or perhaps they simply wanted to isolate her from everyone to prevent her from causing any more harm.

She waited hours on that bed, with nothing to keep her company but the steady pulse of her heart given voice by the machine next to her. The walls were bland, a cream color that offered no inflection. There wasn't a single thing in the room that was legible. In essence the room was blank. Even the most imaginative mind would twiddle their thumbs in this room. A tear rolled down the side of her face but her feelings were too convoluted to pin down the single cause. Disappointment? Concern? Regret? Fear? Desperation? Loneliness? The only person she wanted to see was gone now. Whether he was shot, taken by Schneizel or saved by Rolo, they all meant the same thing; he wasn't with her now. Lelouch was only reason she kept coming back to this world, wasn't he?

Kallen eventually lost track of time, without windows or conversation she had no idea of knowing what time it was, or even what day it was. When she began to regret even coming back to this world by choice the door opened, a small nurse walked into the room and shut the door behind her. "How are you feeling?" The nurse asked with a sense of forbidden kindness on her lips.

"I don't even want to answer that question..." Kallen continued to stare at the ceiling.

"Medically speaking." The nurse clarified.

"Like I've been shot." The red head responded blankly. "How much longer am I going to be held in here?"

"As soon you're considered stable you'll be released into a holding cell. I don't know anything else unfortunately." The nurse walked over to the machine and checked Kallen's vitals and made notes on her chart.

"What about Lelouch?" Kallen asked, finally looking at the nurse now. She needed to be able to see if the woman was lying to her.

"He is being detained in a cell as well, along with C.C." The nurse looked at her watch and began to speed up the process. If she was absent for too long the others may question her.

Kallen thought for a moment. "The Emperor is coming personally to take both of them then?"

"I don't know, I'm sorry I'm just a simple nurse. Ask me medical questions and I can answer them, beyond that I'm on a need to know basis." The nurse finished up her notes and began to walk towards the door.

"Am I going to be okay?" Kallen asked with concern.

"While all the bullets did miss major organs, one did come very close to your heart. I wouldn't involve yourself in any stressful situations or your heart may not be able to handle it." The nurse paused at the door waiting for a response.

"What does that mean?" Kallen held her breath, bracing for more bad news.

"It means that under stress your heart won't perform efficiently, until you've healed. If stressed, the lack of blood to the brain can cause you to faint. Luckily with our current medical technology that threat should be gone within the next day or two." The nurse opened the door and looked up in shock, someone was waiting beyond Kallen's line of sight. The nurse spoke quietly so Kallen couldn't hear and left the room. The door stayed open for a moment so Kallen waited to see who would come through.

Ohgi stepped into her room and looked down at Kallen. His face was distorted in sadness and disgrace. "Why did you do that Kallen? Why did you make me shoot you?"

"Why didn't you-"

"Do you have** any** idea how that felt? Do you know how scared I was when I saw you hit the floor? How worried I've been?" Ohgi held a stern look on his face, he refused to walk closer.

Kallen looked away for a moment, she'd never seen Ohgi like this. "But you were so willing to kill Zero? How hard was **that** for you?" She didn't have any intention of fighting with Ohgi, but strapped to her bed, she'd be damned if she was going to just sit there and let anyone talk about Lelouch like that.

"That wasn't Zero Kallen. That wasn't the man we all respected and followed. It's Lelouch, he's just a manipulative liar. He lied to all of us." Ohgi crossed his arms defensively.

"Everyone lies Ohgi! He did what he had to do to get us where we are now. Without him we would all be dead by now!" Kallen vented, no longer dodging his gaze, but seeking it out. Her pulse was picking up with every syllable.

"At what cost though? Does that justify everything he's done?"

"Of course it does! I would rather be used for victory than killed without reason."

"He betrayed us Kallen!"

"He sure as hell didn't shoot you!" Kallen was beginning to feel slightly dizzy. Remembering what the nurse had told her, she tried to calm down and take deep breaths.

"This isn't the dream Naoto had in mind for you-"

"Don't you dare say that to me." Kallen's voice was harsh and cold, it was not a tone reserved for friends. Ohgi looked down towards the floor, perhaps he had gone a bit too far. She shook her head. "Just go."

"They'll be taking you to your cell soon enough. I'll do everything I can for you." Ohgi turned to leave her in silence again.

"Don't. You've chosen your side and I've chosen mine. We'll just have to live with our consequences." Kallen looked away from her friend, not caring if he looked back before he left. With the click of the door she was left alone again.

-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x

Lelouch was sitting with his back to the wall. His Zero uniform stripped from him, replaced by the white prison clothes that restricted his movements. He thought he would burn from all the hate coursing through his veins. This was all Schneizel's work. For as long as he could remember his older brother would always hold his victories over his head. No triumph was too small for him.

Sitting in the corner of his eight by eight cell was a terrified C.C., her memories still lost somewhere within her mind. Everything around him was crumbling... His witch had become a pushover, his army had become the enemy, his ace was either dead or dying. He went from standing on high, seeing every piece fall into place, to falling from grace, just like one of the many pieces before him. All it took was a prod from his elder brother. All this time he had thought he was winning, but no, Schneizel was simply waiting for his turn.

No. He would not go down this way, not while he drew breath. He would find a way out of this situation, he would prove his worth, once and for all. Just as Schneizel had let so many victories fall from his hands to take the final blow, he would admit defeat to his brother here, but the last laugh would be his. Lelouch had been given plenty of time to think while left in his cell, a plan brewed in his head. Unfortunately, this plan depended on others, something he wasn't used to, or very fond of. All he could do was wait.

-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x

The door hissed open and Kallen appeared before Lelouch, walking into the cell. Her eyes lit up when she saw him. At last she knew that he was safe. She wanted to rush into his arms but with her arms bound behind her back she could only sit next to him. "I'm glad you're safe."

"As am I for you." Lelouch responded with grin. That solved one of his questions. Although without the final piece all this meant was that they would go down together. As romantic as that sounded it wasn't the end he had written for either of them. "You're a very stupid girl."

His words caught her completely off guard, but for some reason she couldn't be angry with him. "What?"

"You shouldn't be here." Lelouch said without looking her direction.

Tears crashed against the back of Kallen's eyelids, she refused to open her eyes to her weakness. She told herself this was simply Lelouch trying to push her away. It wouldn't work this time. "I know what you're doing Lelouch."

He arched a brow, still looking forward. "Do you? Perhaps you could enlighten me then."

"You're pushing me away, again. You don't want another person dragged down by your crimes. As soon as you were caught you threw your life away. You're going to pull everyone's sins onto your shoulders and die alone." Kallen opened her eyes and looked beside her to judge his reaction. He seemed speechless, that was a good sign. "I know you Lelouch, much better than you'd like to admit. I've seen the end of that story, it's not a good one. Not for you, most certainly not for me."

Lelouch looked back at her finally. She knew? He hadn't planned that far, but it was an outcome that he foresaw. It was his most likely plan of action, although he was still missing many pieces in that plan, namely the person to take up the mask of Zero. Even still that plan was far off in the future, he had many more pressing problems before him. "How could you possibly know any of that?"

"Just as I knew they would betray you, I've seen one possible outcome." Kallen continued to gaze into his violet eyes. They were beautiful in their skepticism.

"That isn't possible Kallen." He said coldly.

"I've stopped believing in the impossible. It's time you did too." Kallen pressed herself forward and placed a tender kiss on his lips. They both struggled awkwardly to maintain the kiss, with their hands tied behind their backs and no way to stay balanced.

"Brother?" Rolo prodded from the open cell door. Anya stood beside him with a strange smile on her face. Lelouch and Kallen pulled themselves to their feet and Rolo made quick work of their restraints. "We have to move quickly."

Anya walked over to C.C. who was still silent with shock and fear in the corner. "It is time C.C." Marianne placed her hand on the witch's shoulder.

"Sorry I didn't come sooner brother, I had to lay low until the right moment showed itself." Rolo handed over a communicator to Lelouch. "It sounds like we only have one other person loyal to our cause now, I told him to await your orders on a private channel."

Lelouch nodded in response, he had an idea who, that would be most helpful in their escape. "Have you checked on the Guren and Shinkiro?"

"Both are guarded but most of the Black Knights are in a diplomatic meeting with Britannia. Deciding what they will trade in exchange for your life." Rolo watched the hallway to keep an eye out for any other former comrade he would have to kill.

"Did you manage to get Anya on our side as well?" Lelouch asked motioning back towards the small girl.

"I am no longer Anya, Lelouch. It's me, Marianne." Anya looked back with a motherly smile on her face. She and C.C. stood to walk towards the cell entrance.

Lelouch's eyes went wide. "What? Mother?"

"She's speaking the truth Lelouch." C.C. said simply. "But we don't have time to explain, we have to get out of here." She didn't wait for confirmation pushing past the others with a signature coldness.

Things were going better than Lelouch or Kallen could have ever hoped. 'It's about time', Kallen thought to herself. So far this was the only good change she'd seen, other than the time her and Lelouch shared in his quarters. "What are your orders Lelouch?"

"Do you think you'll be alright piloting the Guren?" He asked noting her condition.

"Better than rotting in that cell." Kallen replied with a grin, trying to hide the pain in her torso. She could do this, more than that, she had to, for Lelouch.

"Very well, we're going to the main hanger. Hopefully the Guren will be there as well, now that the repairs are finished." The five of them made their way to the hanger, the halls were rather empty. When they did find a soldier roaming the halls Rolo made quick work of them. Lelouch made sure to instruct him not to kill anyone, simply knock them unconscious. Perhaps their favor could still be won, but not under the current circumstances. Once they arrived at the hanger they each got into their respective Knightmares. The Guren was in fact moved to the main hanger. "Everyone I'm setting up a private channel for this group. Once your systems are operational, disable all other Knightmares in this hanger." Lelouch sent the code to the Knightmares individually, including the Siegfried. One by one they crippled the Knightmares in the hanger, there was no way the Black Knights could give chase now. "Everyone are you prepared to move?"

"Yes, your majesty." Jeremiah responded over the comm as he moved into position to cover their exit.

"Ready and waiting." Marianne responded, preparing the Stark Hadron Cannon.

"You and your dramatics." C.C. shook her head and prepared the Vincent for combat.

"I'm ready." Kallen took a deep breath and waited for further instructions.

"Now." Lelouch ordered, Rolo sitting behind him in the Shinkiro.

With a deafening blast the Mordred destroyed the hanger door and the four Knightmares burst out. Kallen was doing everything she could to keep her adrenaline at bay, she had to keep herself calm. Swarms of Britannian Knightmares came to meet the rebels. With their four superior machines, Lelouch and his new comrades cut through the enemies like ribbons. The Mordred was suppressing the enemy flagships while the Guren and Vincent cut through the Sutherlands and helicopters. They continued to push with great force, although the combat did slow them down.

"My lord! Behind us!" Jeremiah shouted bringing his Siegfried around to hold back the Tristran and Lancelot.

"We have to crush these two quickly, soon more Knights of the Round will be upon us." Marianne informed, still she had to keep pressing on the flagships or they would send out more Knightmares and eventually overwhelm them.

"Mordred, keep pushing them back we need to create an escape route. C.C., Kallen, dive down and prepare to strike both the Lancelot and Tristran at once from beneath them. Jeremiah keep the Knightmares at bay, I'm going to draw the Knights of the Round to me."

"With pleasure Majesty!" Jeremiah shouted as the Siegfried fired in multiple directions. His command over the Knightmare specifically built for him was incredible. It was like a spider amongst a swarm of mindless insects.

"Understood." Kallen and C.C. responded diving down as the Shinkiro came out to meet Suzaku and Gino.

"Lelouch, give up. Your tyrannical reign ends here. I have been given permission to kill you here." Suzaku stated over a local channel.

"As I've said before dear friend, the only ones who should kill are those prepared to be killed. I hope your souls are at peace." The Shinkiro flew at full thrust towards the two Knights. Suzaku and Gino prepared to strike the Shinkiro down.

"Such an aggressive maneuver for that defensive Knightmare." Gino scoffed as he drew his swords.

"Now Rolo!" Lelouch shouted and Rolo obeyed, his geass froze the Knights in their tracks, while C.C. and Kallen remained out of range. The Tristran and the Lancelot began to fall from the sky.

"That's the signal." C.C. smirked. The Vincent and Guren closed in on the two Knights. "We have them, Rolo."

"Understood." Rolo released his geass.

Lelouch looked down to see the Vincent impaling the Lancelot and the Tristran bubbling in the grip of the Guren. "So long, brave Knights."

"What? How coul-" Gino's question was cut off by the explosion engulfing him.

Kallen's heart was racing. She just killed Gino. The only friend that she'd known for the past two seasons. And she did it with a smile on her face and a clear conscience. Suddenly it was becoming difficult to breathe, her vision was blurring. "No, not now!" She shouted, she could feel herself drifting away.

C.C. noticed that the Guren was beginning to drop. She abandoned her attack on the Lancelot after striking the float unit and dove to rescue her falling ally. "Kallen!"

**AN: **Alrighty then, it's about time something started to look up for Lelouch and Kallen eh? They've pulled quite the team together now. Hope you enjoyed the chapter as much as I did : ) Thank **you** for reading.


	7. Without a Key

Without a key

**A/N**: Wow has it been a while eh? I'm sorry for such a long delay, there are good reasons but I doubt anyone cares to hear them. For those of you that have been following Wings of the Butterfly, don't worry as I stated in the beginning I have no intention of abandoning these fics. Thank you very kindly for your patience, I'll do my best to keep to a regular schedule from here on out. :)

Kallen's throat was tight and her ears were ringing. She tried to voice a scream but could only cough repeatedly. Her heavy eyelids pushed open to reveal a medical team looking over her. This seemed to be fairly common these days, but strangely enough these people seemed to be relieved, rather than disappointed or worried. Everyone was talking and smiling but she struggled to understand them. Why did her chest feel as if she'd just taken a kick from a horse. Come to think of it why was her chest exposed? A female doctor was shining a light in her eyes, which Kallen tried to look away from but found her efforts useless. Her mouth continued to move but her ears were still ringing. The doctor didn't seem very worried anymore, which Kallen took as a good thing. Kallen tried to speak, tried to ask what was going on but she couldn't hear herself. What's worse is that after speaking the doctor suddenly didn't look so sure of herself.

"Seems there was some damage to the brain." The female doctor sighed.

"So, that's still better than a stiff right? Besides what would you expect from a case like hers? How long was she officially dead?" The male nurse standing beside the doctor asked.

"About four minutes, if add that to blood loss and drug use, I'm surprised she's alive. This girl has been put through the wringer."

"By her own choice doc, for what it's worth I think you did a fine job. I wouldn't beat yourself up over it."

"It's not a matter of questioning Hanson, it's merely a standard. I don't like to make a habit of losing patients." The doctor responded.

"Unfortunately that's not always our choice." Hanson sighed.

"Ultimately no, but without acting we do make that choice. Life is precious whether it belongs to a slob junky or a million dollar man, don't ever forget that."

Kallen wanted to shout out at that last statement, taking personal offense to it. She may seem like a drugged up bum to them but she was.. She was.. Perhaps she was... It wasn't until she looked away from the doctors that she took notice to the room she was in. Something seemed off, this didn't look like a normal hospital room. She tried to sit up but found herself restrained. The doctors seemed to be lost in a conversation. Kallen was beginning to panic, she had no idea where she was but it felt very out of place. She didn't belong here. "Where am I?" Kallen tried to ask.

Hanson looked down on her. "Do you think she knows?"

"Probably not. Even if she did know, she'd keep trying. Wouldn't you?" The doctor looked down into Kallen's terrified blue eyes. "Can you hear me?" Kallen nodded. "We'll have to run some tests but you seem to have a problem speaking. You are in currently on suicide watch in the psychiatric ward." As the words came out of her mouth the doctor could see the pain and sadness spread across her face. "You're lucky to be alive Ms. Stadtfeld. Just try to get some rest."

Kallen couldn't believe what she had just heard. She'd been locked up in a crazy bin. How was she going to get out of this? How was she going to find some refrain in a place like this? It seemed like each time she returned to this side the more urgent her return to the other side became. Or was that also an effect of the gripping drug?

The doctors left her side and a heavy locking sound came from the other side of the door. She couldn't get out in this condition. The room was a blinding white and every cabinet had locks on it. There wasn't a single object on the counters and the doctors took all of the equipment needed to revive her. She tried to struggle against her restraints but found them to be absent. Had she imagined the restraints or was that an after effect of her ordeal? She pulled herself to a sitting position with great effort and was able to look out of a single window that looked into her room. Her mother was outside looking in on her with a devastated expression. Kallen couldn't bare to exchange glances with her mother at the moment and tried to examine more of the room she was in. Struggling to find anything of note, all she could see out of the ordinary was a single camera in the corner of the ceiling. No doubt to ensure she didn't try anything.

Looking back at the plain bed she decided to take the doctor's advice. Currently there wasn't a single thing she could to better her situation. The best chance that she had was to rest and hopefully regain her voice. She glanced at her mother once more and tried to tell her that she loved her, and that she was sorry with her eyes. Kallen couldn't tell if her mother understood her or not but a tear fell from her left eye as the doctors continued to speak with her.

Kallen closed her eyes and everything went black before her, she had no comprehension of time but a soothing voice eventually brought her back.

-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x

"Hello Kallen." She looked up into beautiful pools of purple. Her eyes widened, she recognized those eyes, that hair, that voice. Lelouch was standing next to her. She tried with every fiber of her being to say something to him but it seemed that he couldn't hear her. "You know, it pains me to see you like this. I suppose I didn't quite take into consideration the consequences of my actions. Where's my queen filled with fire and spirit? You were always the one to bring me back to earth, I don't even know where to start. I never wanted anything like this for you Kallen... You were supposed to be happy."

Tears streamed out of Kallen's eyes, was this real? Hell everything she'd seen in the past month provoked the same question. She couldn't tell if she was dreaming or not. The room around her was a blinding white but that didn't affirm her belief one way or the other she tried to look for the camera on the ceiling but Lelouch was standing over her, blocking her view. Without being able to ask him to move she tried to adjust her positioning but found herself bound to her bed by thick leather straps. God she must have looked so pathetic to him there. How could he look at her with any resemblance of affection?

All she knew was that she had so many things she wanted to tell him, but she was silenced, like so many other times. Words needed to be said, feelings meant to be explained, love that begged for response. All of which had been interrupted and delayed by events beyond her control. It was because of this pattern and because it was so painful to endure that she deemed this meeting to be real. She had no explanation as to how he was alive, or how he'd found her. It simply hurt too much to be artificial. Everything she wanted was standing in front of her but she couldn't grasp it, she couldn't even touch it. This was a truly genius method of torture.

"I was told I should try to talk to you. The doctors said that you needed something to live for. Apparently you were going on and on about me before you were brought here. Saying that you needed to save me." Lelouch looked away from her for a moment a clear jab of pain or perhaps remorse came over him. An emotion that was rather rare for him, in the end he could justify nearly every one of his sins. For some reason this outcome was something a bit harder for him to swallow. "So I've come to return the favor. You saved me so now it's my turn. Please don't leave us, please don't leave me. We've both been there, and it wasn't any better for me than it was for you." He paused for a long while, not entirely sure what else to say. Kallen's eyelids grew heavier and heavier with each passing moment but she struggled to stay conscious. Lelouch chewed on his lip for a moment before staring back into her flooded cerulean eyes. "I'll get you out of here as soon as I can." He left a gentle kiss on her lips, and as he pulled away the scenery faded back to black.

-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x

When she opened her eyes again she had no idea how long she had been out. She looked around and noticed that she was no longer bound to her bed. She felt the need to stand up, as if she'd been sleeping for days. Upon noticing that the wounds in her arms were nearly healed that thought seemed very plausible. It wasn't long after she stood that a doctor walked into her room.

"Kallen are you feeling okay?" The doctor asked, trying to make sure that her patient didn't need anything.

"I feel a little stiff." Kallen responded, and to her surprise she could hear herself speak. "Did you just hear me?"

"Of course I heard you Kallen." The doctor responded looking at her notes.

"I can talk." Kallen marveled at the sound of her own voice.

"For some time now, don't you remember?" The doctor arched a brow, with pen in hand waiting eagerly.

Kallen took note of how the doctor spoke and the pen in her hand. Something was going on, but she needed to keep up an act. Her mind raced for a moment to conceive a believable lie. "Yeah, I'm sorry. I had a strange dream about when I couldn't talk. It took me a moment to shake it off is all."

The doctor smiled in a strange manner and raised her pen from the pad she held in her hand. "Good to hear. Wouldn't want your interview to be delayed."

"I'm looking forward to it." Kallen nodded and smiled. Without another word the doctor wisped away and locked the door.

Kallen made sure to look away from the camera in the corner. Just what the hell was going on? Apparently she'd been awake for quite some time and had regained her speech a while ago. She must have had talks with doctors before for them to know. Why couldn't she remember any of it? She tried to force it out of her mind, it sounded like she had an interview soon. Hopefully that interview would lead to her dismissal from this place and she could return to Lelouch. But which Lelouch would that be? Which one was real? Were they both real? What did real even mean? She felt like she was losing her mind. Everything was just a swirl of watercolors blending together to make an abstract painting of her life. It had no lines to keep everything in check, to separate the false from the facts. She closed her eyes and brought her hand to her head to think for a moment. She just needed to hold herself together for a little while longer, then she could figure all of this out.

-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x

She nodded to herself and opened her eyes. Kallen was surprised to see that now she was laying down. If that wasn't enough she tried to sit up and found her leather bindings had returned. In a panic she looked around the room trying to figure out what had just happened. Her mother walked into the room and the door locked behind her. Her mother had a demoralized look on her face as she approached her. Kallen tried to compose herself and welcome her mother but found she couldn't hear herself talk. She got an overwhelming sense of fear as her mother towered over her.

"Don't worry sweety, I'm not here to hurt you. The doctors told me that it would be helpful to bring you things that would help anchor you. Unfortunately looking around not a lot came to mind, and the things that did couldn't pass the security. I did remember this though." Her mother held in front of her a letter with the initials L.L. on it in perfect cursive. "I'm not sure who it is from but it's addressed to your Japanese name, so I'm sure whoever it is that they knew you well." Her mother placed the letter on Kallen's chest. "I'm sure you would rather read it yourself than have me read it to you. So when I leave you can read it."

Kallen wanted to reassure her mother and tell her that everything was going to be okay, but she didn't even believe that, not at the moment anyway. Her mother dutifully left the room, trying to hold back tears but not completely successful. Some time after her mother had left the bindings were removed and she was able to look at the letter that her mother had left for her. Looking at it she could only think of one person with the initials L.L. Still unsure of herself or her situation she opened the letter, it wasn't very long.

"Dear Kallen, I'm not sure how these past few months have found you. You may hate me, you may still care for me, either way I know that I'm not pleased with the way we parted. At the very least I'm sure you have some questions for me. I'll be in touch soon, please wait for me. L.L."

Clearly this letter was written before he'd come to see her. Was she jumping back and forth through time or was she really just going crazy? Even with his handwriting in front of her, Lelouch seemed farther away than ever. How was she going to fix this? She stirred herself into hysteria and began to sob. After some time of crying in frustration she rubbed her eyes to try to think of a solution.

"Think Kallen think." She heard herself this time.

-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x

"Think about what Kallen?" An unfamiliar voice asked.

She opened her eyes to see a professional looking man in front of her. She was still in her room but yet again she must have jumped to a different time. "Nothing. What the hell is going on?" Kallen vented in frustration.

"I'm here to perform an evaluation to see what types of treatment we need to pursue Ms. Stadtfeld." The gentleman with a clean shaven face and tweed suit responded politely.

"What kind of treatment?" Kallen prodded.

"There are many forms of treatment for your condition Ms. Stadtfeld a simple survey of questions will help us determine which form would be most effective in your case."

"I just want to go home!" Kallen nearly shouted.

"Well I'm afraid that isn't possible at the moment. You're still very ill." The man replied in an overly calm tone.

This place was starting to give Kallen the chills, everything simply seemed spooky like something out of a sci fi flick or something. For some reason she couldn't contain her sudden rage, she felt like a caged animal being poked at. "Yeah? And whose standards say something's wrong with me? I never wanted to hurt anyone! You people are just getting in my way."

"I see." The man jotted something down on his pad of paper.

"Stop doing that!" Kallen stood up violently but found herself being forced to the ground quickly from behind.

"That's unfortunate, you were making great progress for the first few days. We'd hoped to do this without restraints but that doesn't seem possible at the moment." The man sighed.

Unseen hands binded Kallen's hands together while forcing her face into the floor. Kallen gritted her teeth and winced in pain.

-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x

When she opened her eyes she discovered that she was alone. Outside.

Not just outside of her room but outside of the complex entirely. The sun was shining down on her, a welcomed feeling. She looked around to try to figure out where she was, but she didn't recognize any landmarks. She was definitely in the ghettos though, she could tell that much. The buildings were disheveled and the dominating of dirt and filth filled her lungs. For some reason all of her senses were dull. The things she saw had a haze to them, things she heard seemed to echo slightly. She heard footsteps behind her and whirled around to see the figure walking from around the corner. It was Lelouch.

"You said you wanted me to meet you here at five sharp? Said you needed to do something." He was wearing a black jacket that hugged his form tightly and buttoned up the middle. It came down to his mid thighs where his black slacks continued. He looked very good in the outfit, which wasn't surprising to Kallen. To her he looked good in just about everything.

What was he saying about meeting her here? Something she had to do? An explanation would be a godsend right now. Why couldn't she get control over herself. Despite the fact that everything seemed a bit off it also felt incredibly familiar. A feeling that incited happiness, but she couldn't put her finger on it."Yeah I'm sorry my head is kinda messing with me."

"That's to be expected. It's probably an effect of withdrawal." Lelouch stated plainly.

"That's it!" Kallen said matter-of-factly. That had to be it, the drug that altered her perception of time was bound to have some crazy withdrawal effects. Judging by the wounds in her arms she must have been clean for a few weeks now. Everything was finally starting to fall into place. This however brought her to a fork in the road. A decision needed to be made. Kallen bit her lip, fumbling in her pockets she found something that suddenly made her gut turn. Another piece of the puzzle fell into place, she understood why her senses were fading. She closed her eyes and begged that was just in her head. She pulled out her hand to find an empty vial. It was as if the decision was already made for her. She must have injected herself before she figured everything out. With nothing making sense and time hopping all over the place on her, it makes sense that she would want to simply take the easy way out, flee back to the other world, just like she'd always done. Thinking the withdrawal effect to be permanent the other world sounded like a dream. Unfortunately this world seemed like a dream she'd slowly twisted into a nightmare. Lelouch spotted the vial in her hands with unease and rushed to her side as she began to collapse.

"Kallen! Please don't do this! KALLEN!"

**A/N**: Whew, sorry I'm sure that one was difficult to keep up with and some parts might not have made sense but don't worry that was all intended. You need somethings to not make sense to feed the dillusion. This was a one time only thing though, later chapters will not follow this format. She will no longer have withdrawals.


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